30 July 2013

Stress Sewing

WHEW... busy month. Jamie finally came back from Ye Olde Lincoln Nebraska, and after a weekend of fun with friends and family we hit the ground running... well, actually, first I puked my brains out for 24 hours, THEN we got down to business. Not sure what that was all about, but I guess there was a flu going around. Anyway!

We spent three days in the Bay area hunting for the perfect Santa Cruz home! Day One, utter failure. Day Two, a little less discouraging. Day Three, found the coolest loft in an industrial complex that was affordable and awesome and roomy (quite an elusive trifecta in Santa Cruz). But, we didn't make the cut (we were competing with 20 other people to apply...). However, we are now waiting to hear back from a different property manager about a couple of other places in the area. The places we're applying for aren't as cool as the one we missed out on, but the company managing them seems great and there are walls and roofs and working toilets at both of them, so it'll do. :P Trying to stay positive here... We were both pretty disappointed about not getting the first place we applied to, but I'm determined to make the best of it.

Needless to say, I've been pretty stressed out in the last couple of weeks (having Jamie back helps for sure). Last night when we got the news that we didn't get the place we wanted, I was tempted to just crawl into bed and go to sleep at 8:00 pm, but I lay there for a few minutes and decided I didn't want to do that after all. I wanted to sew a skate wheel bag. So I did.

I used an old corduroy pant leg + some extra fabric from the dress I made last week! (Speaking of which, I should post pictures of that, too)...

Holds 8 wheels and their nuts quite snugly! I even made a little nut sack! ;)

Perfect wheel bag for my other set of wheels! I also used some cool stitching on my machine for decoration. ♥

Then, this morning I woke up at 5:30 am and decided to get out of bed and alter some clothes. This old shapeless, knee-length dress and a pair of capris I've had for like five years are now an adorable outfit!
I feel accomplished.

♥ Ciara Kay

16 July 2013

Cool Stuff Roundup

There have been way too many essays on existential crises on this blog as of late.

Time for frivolity.

Things I Would Buy If I Wasn't About to Move to Santa Cruz Where All of My Money Will Go To Rent and Food...

by lessandmore
by wayfaringart
by redrage77
by prairiebungalow
by piperandpaisley
Still playing the waiting game... waiting for Jamie to come home... waiting to find a home... waiting for the chance to job search... waiting for the right timing... waiting, waiting, WAITING...

♥ Ciara Kay

11 July 2013

Still here... also, a Sale!

I am still alive! It's a long story. Suffice it to say my first big breakdown in over 8 months was hellacious. But everything's ok now! More on that later. Maybe.

I Quit The Internet update:

Here are some results of No Internet so far, since it's been over a month now...
  • I have had way more time to reflect, and I think that is part of why my depression got so bad. Without the distractions I had to face the things that have been bothering me (mostly issues about my purpose in life, you know, the usual 20-something agenda).
  • I haven't (in general) felt so much pressure to perform.
  • I haven't had as big of a to-do list and have felt happier in general (last weekend aside).
  • I have more time on my hands.
  • I also haven't done a whole lot in the last few weeks besides watch tv, eat, and read. I haven't produced anything, which was the ultimate goal of less internet.
Lately I've failed at keeping time limits, and even started browsing outside of the approved list of sites (GASP). But I am going to forgive myself and move on... I've had bigger fish to fry lately. I have been thinking that my focus is wrong (see last post on how my issues are bigger than how much time I spend online), and that rather than trying to remove something from my life I need to concentrate on adding something (art, in particular) which should hopefully shove out the need for distractions. I want art to be a part of my daily life more than I want to not be on the internet. I need to replace the internet with creative habits. I feel like I've forgotten myself as an artist because I've spent so much of my creative time on jobs. I don't remember the last time I finished a personal work. I don't even remember how to do a big piece of art, as all of my projects have been one-time things or made up of a bunch of little pieces. I want to draw dragons and aliens again! I want to do big paintings and illustrations again! But I don't remember how and it just seems like too much work.

I think I have some legitimate reasons for not doing big paintings and illustrations... I got a full time job and got married right after high school, which really changed my entire life (totally worth it, but I guess I'm still adjusting)... and the last year, particularly the last month has been insane. Husband gone for 6 weeks (I did get to visit him a couple weekends ago, it was wonderful!), roommates whose lifestyles do not in any way align with my own (I thrive on habit, routine, and tidiness, they apparently do not), zero luck finding housing in Santa Cruz (where we are supposedly moving at the end of the month), no job prospects, and then I go and have a breakdown. So excuse me for not creating masterpieces during all of this! I need to not be such a perfectionist... I am the only person in the world who expects me to have made oodles of amazing artwork by now. :P That said, when we do get our own place and I do have a routine and a job, I want to start forming some creative habits and making art a big part of my life again... I'm looking for any help + input on that front if anyone has advice!

Still not sure what the future holds for Scoutaroo, but it's looking like it will be sticking around a bit longer at some capacity! Even if it does putter out, I'm determined not to let my art keep limping along like this... I want to take the next step, whatever that is. I've had a lot to think about in the last few weeks and I'm still muddling through a lot of it, but in my next post hopefully I'll be able to share some of the decisions I've come to about what I'll be pursuing next.

In the meantime, buy some cheap stationery! For the month of July I'm selling all my stationery sets for just $10... to make room for new stuff and give me less things to pack. :P BUY IT, you know you want it! ;)

♥ Ciara Kay